guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Randomize