if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize