bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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