the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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