Where did you get a picture of my penis
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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