i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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