I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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