He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
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Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
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My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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