He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
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Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
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Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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