Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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