Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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