You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
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