We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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