i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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