But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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