Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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