no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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