he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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