ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
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There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
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I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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