y did u give ur computer a hand job?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
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