I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
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