hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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