His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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