Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I feel like abortions should bother me more
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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