He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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