I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize