Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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