Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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