if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize