FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
My ATM looks so different sober.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Randomize