Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize