look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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