i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize