Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize