FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize