vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize