Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize