he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize