Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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