yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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