pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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