I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
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