Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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