new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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