Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize