I molested 6 butterflies tonight
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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