Joe is yelling at the trees again.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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