no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
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I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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