He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
That accounts for only three of the penises
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
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