Can Purell be used as lube?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize